With only a month left in Spain, I can’t help but start to reflect on how this adventure has panned out. We all start with expectations, and often times, they don’t work out at all like you expected them to. Obviously, I had some crazy expectations, it’s a trip I’d been dreaming about for 3/4 of my life, but I am completely okay with the fact that everything is so much different than I expected.
Spain is amazing. The culture is so much different than where I grew up, and the only reason I was able to adjust so well is because I had a crazy zest to live here, and to fully experience it all, not to mention, i came with, and met here, some of the most wonderful people I have ever known in my life. The people who have made this experience what it is. My Spanish has improved, I eat dinner at 930pm, and I have finally let go of so many things I was holding onto for negative reasons, things that were bringing me down before. Initially, I wanted these blog entries to be about my day-to-day adventures, everything that happened, a play-by-play of my life in Salamanca, but now, I can’t seem to even fathom putting everything into words that make sense. Everything that’s happened since I’ve been here. I’ve immersed myself into the culture, and I don’t think I’m back yet. I have learned so much, but they are different kinds of memories. Right now, I’m still not even sure this trip is happening.
I never expected to meet people who I could become so close with when they can barely understand me sometimes, people who we could have such a language barier with but still become such great friends because we have fun together, I didn’t expect to become so close with girls I go to school with in the states but barely talked to before this, I didn’t expect to feel so comfortable living, eating, and talking to complete strangers in a foreign language, and I didn’t expect to fall so in love with a physical place, rather than a person, but that’s the funny & all together great thing about having expectations. I have been told that to not expect anything is better, in fact, cynicism says, that in order to be happy we must not expect anything, therefore we will never miss anything. Although, sometimes I feel cynical towards my expectations, upset that I ever expected anything at all, I believe expectations are comparable to dreams — “Expecting too much in life is much better than expecting too little.” If we dream big, we may not fulfill everything, but at least we’ll be working for SOMETHING, and in fact in the end we will fulfill something, the bigger we dream, the bigger are fulfillments are. I never thought i’d be in Spain right now, but here I am. And I never thought that anything that has happened here was going to but yet again, i’ve been surprised — it feels good to dream big and to expect big things, we are dissapointed sometime, but very often we are pleasantly surprised, and we have very little else to thank, but our power that is driven by our big dreams!